IxChel Lec

I Dream Of Home

IxChel Lec
I Dream Of Home

I dream of home

I dream of becoming home


I see it when I close my eyes

when the cold seeps in from my window

then, I dream of home

my eyes close and inside me they open

my brown skin slowly becomes the warm brown soil

and my veins, with their red blood,

are the virgin waters that flow beneath the surface  

I can feel it,

when I lose myself to the depths of sleep

my thoughts grow thicker

Until, they become clear

no longer in my possession but they are clear

they have now become the wind

they have become Xocomil


in a constant whisper


I am home now


my eyes open inside of me

and they no longer are eyes but they are lakes,

the craters of the volcanoes that millions of years ago were flooded by rain

Atitlan and Amatitlan

my lakes


I have become home


coffee and corn grow from my arms

I can hear the quetzales and the guardabarrancos singing soft melodies into my ears

perched from the trees that now grow from my head


I feel the small flap from the wings of the hummingbirds,

flying from flower to flower in the cloud forest that has emerged from my legs  


I feel my chest become the Ciera Madre

33 volcanoes slowly growing from my ribs.

I am home now.

I feel the pain of home now.


My skin cracks when the virgin waters that run through my veins are slowly drained

because of deforestation my skin melts off in the mud slides,

that come during the harsh rainy season

My eyes sting,


my beautiful lake

muddy now with pesticides and sewage


I hear the shots fired at the quetzales

that one by one fall from the sky where they once ruled the rain forest

their emerald and ruby feathers ripped from their corpses,

slowly they become extinct


I feel the trees being ripped from my scalp

to make space for the sugar cane


I no longer feel the hummingbird wings flap

they fly away in search of the flora, that no longer grows in my forest

the cloud forest that grew from my legs shrinks


but I am home now.